Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Cause I'ma W-O-M-A-N!!!

Oh, that sugar and spice…everything nice, if that’s what little girls are made of, what’s in a woman?

This is something I’ve been fighting over for some years now…Gender Equality, or the convient lack of. This will be a two part post with part #1 dealing with Rape and Sexual Assault while part #2 will focus on Domestic Violence.

HISTORY: Around the end of the Eighteenth century a European writer by the name of Mary Wollstonecraft gained notoriety for her outward expression and egalitarian views on gender. She wrote a controversial pamphlet entitled, “The Vindication of the Rights of Woman,” and pretty much became the nations first “feminist.”

-‘The rights of woman,’ undoubtedly a worthy enough cause to argue during that period of enlightenment. Moving past pre and post Civil War and WWII right into the liberation that was gained through educational advancement and equal opportunity employment laws; the 1950’s brought about a (k)new day for American woman (mainly European women of course).

-Now, all of these things were done in an effort to end disparity amongst the sexes; dispell the idea of women being the 'weaker' and needing the protection of or being under the control of a man..."anything you can do,I can do better, I can do anything better than you," well, not exactly, by you get my point.

-Now, with regard to rape, which is a very serious offense, but with layers (I'll be focused on the bolded layers):
-layer 1)Attacked by a total stranger.
-layer 2) Date or Aquantence rape
-layer 3) Relationship rape (yes, there's such a thing)


Why is it socially acceptable for a woman to entertain the company of a man, engage in whatever level of physical pleasure she desires, decide she’s not really ready OR interested in going “all the way” (sometimes after having gone almost ALL THE WAY) say NO, and expect ALL the blame to be placed on the male for not having:

1) The BETTER sense to know that NO MEANS NO.

2) For not being emotionally STRONGER and stop himself as soon as those words were spoken and

3) For not being compassionate and realizing how SENSATIVE and DELICATE women are

Where’s the equality? Where’s the shared responsibility? What happened to the two adults, forget things being consensual because that's a given when the woman decided to engage? Never knowingly put yourself in a situation you can’t get out of; if you KNOW you don’t play to have sex with a guy, there’s really no need playing after midnight (in house) games; if the dates over GO HOME (alone). What’s the point in starting things you KNOW you’re not going to finish…then expect the man to be the ‘bigger’ person and stop?

Seriously, in situations like this…I’d give the woman just as much jail time as the man…it’s accountability ladies…it’s EQUALITY!

With regard to the third level of rape (relationship), I used to think this was a joke, but there are thousands of women around the world who've reported being raped by their husband or boyfriend. I'm not condoning this level of violence by ANY means and I know there are husbands who view their wife as personal property (WRONG) you BELONG to each other (so says the Bible), but at the same time there are TOO many woman using sex as a means of controlling their HUSBANDS and that's not the character of a WIFE...each is to esteem the other greater then themselves...that's EQUALITY!

This injustice is so damaging, because it creates fear and uncertainty within male and female encounters. Men can fear getting intimate with a women, because he never knows if he'll be accused of rape. Then there are women who have sexual incounters THEN a month or so down the line say they were raped...because they didn't really want to do it...man, the whole word 'Rape' is being reshaped everytime I turn around. I personally think rape is an act of PHYSICAL FORCE... not MENTAL. If a woman ALLOWS a man to convince her to have sex with him when she REALLY didn't want to...she was NOT raped. This serious issue has been adjusted...and readjusted over time and it's to the point where a man can look at a woman for a minute TOO long and she can accuse him of some form of rape. CRAZY!

NOTE: AGAIN, if you're a women and are uncertain about a sexual exchange with a man PLEASE think about things before hand...don't make your issue a joint problem...KNOW YOURSELF... know your boundaries and your weaknesses. STD's aren't the only things we need to protect ourselves from...you've got to protect your heart and your mind...so make sure you're WELL informed about the situations you decide to get YOURSELF into.


(Don't be mad at me 13, (lol) I just had to talk about this)

43 comments:

Dangerfield said...

"Why is it socially acceptable for a woman to entertain the company of a man, engage in whatever level of physical pleasure she desires, decide she’s not really ready OR interested in going “all the way”"

mark bey: JMW I agree that women should be very careful of the situations they allowed themselves to be put in.

But lets say a man and a woman are about to get it on and she request that he uses a condom, but because theyve had sex before without a condom and he dosent have one this time he assumes he shouldnt have to use one.

What if the women just came to a new awakening and is headed for college and subconciously she knows that getting pregnant will hurt her chances of gettng that college degree.

Now say under these circumstances she tells him you dont have a condom so no sex. Now say they start kissing and petting and getting hot and heavy and she breaks of and says no glove no love the brotha has to accept this.

In fact if for any reason a women says no then that is that.

Now I do feel you in that women should not put themselves in situations where something bad could happen such as being at a party getting drunk, passing out and then having sex/being taking advantage of by several different guys in one night.

The man should be the bigger person because if she says no that is no because it is the womans body and no man has a right to force sex out of a women regardless of the situation.

Oh by the way this is comming from a brotha that has begged for it many, many times so dont get it twisted I understand the plight of a brotha in that situation but if she says no we must respect that.

JMW your deeper point about woman being careful of the situations they allow themselves to be in is a fundemtal point to survival. Good post, Goodmorning and I look forward to part 2 of this post.

deepnthought said...

PART 2

JustMeWriting said...

mark, as always you've raised and EXCELLENT situation to ponder and I TOTALLY agree with that situation...of course all that I've said it subjective...this would be an acception to the rule ;)

Also, in a situation like that...It would be assumed that these two people have know a bit about each other (well they should have) so, it's pretty safe to say she's not really dealing with a guy who'd go to the extreem of rape because he doesn't have a condom...he'd be mad, but get over it...otherwise he's a CRAZY-NUT and she missed something about his personality somewhere within the line.

Anonymous said...

Agreed. Excellent post and unique point of view. Sex is more than an act of love or affection. It is an act of responsibility and trust. (Rape is a whole other issue).

I agree that it should never be used as a weapon and that both parties should be very careful of the positions they put themselves in. But ultimately, if a woman said "no" to me? I'd be up and out. I've done it. I'm aware of the double standard and brother is not trying to catch a case. We're all adults and all have choice. Put thought into how you excercise that choice...in ANY relationship.

Tasha said...

Very thought provoking post. It's a unique point of view that I've adopted to an extent, and I have been on the receiving end of relationship rape. Women are always looked at as the victim no matter how the situation began, and that's not always the best way to look at it. In some (but definitely not all) situations, the woman deserves just as much, if not more blame than the man

anonymousnupe said...

Heavy stuff here today. I definitely was not expecting it. You got layers. You know how I like to fun, but there's nothing at all funny about forcibly (through physical or psychological means) taking personal belongings from someone else. (Chuckling gently at the "13" reference, though.)

Anonymous said...

@Justme:

1) The BETTER sense to know that NO MEANS NO.

I believe that though women should try to avoid certain situations, a man ultimately must be master of himself and understand that NO means stop, if the woman really meant yes, oh well, if there is a next time perhaps she will be clearer.

2) For not being emotionally STRONGER and stop himself as soon as those words were spoken and

Well, I am not a chauvinist, but I am chivalrous. I believe that men and women are EQUAL but not the SAME. Men should exercise the strength that is befitting them as men,

3) For not being compassionate and realizing how SENSITIVE and DELICATE women are

Again, equal but not the same, in GENERAL (not always) women are more sensitive and delicate i.e "The weaker vessel" as Scripture says, men should be aware of that and act accordingly.

JUST my 2 cents...

JustMeWriting said...

dj: YES... I'm in total agreement, but that doesn't excuse the accountability issue to me. Given account to all of that, it's still a situation where the responibility is shared...well I think it should be.

It's the double standard that I can't stand.

nupe: LOL... yeah, on the layers...I'm a parfait...lol and EVERYBODY loves a parfait.

JustMeWriting said...

@ nupe: I just don't think there's a such thing as psychological force...if a person ALLOWS themself to be CONVINCED of sonething that's still their call.

soj: "Sex is more than an act of love or affection. It is an act of responsibility and trust" I TOTALLY AGREE.

tasha: "Women are always looked at as the victim no matter how the situation began, and that's not always the best way to look at it. In some (but definitely not all) situations, the woman deserves just as much, if not more blame than the man" AMEN... and that's really all I'm saying...LoL. I do realize that my thoughts about this may make me appear to be more onesided, but I do realize things are circumstanceual.

Anonymous said...

@Justme:

I agree on the accountability issue.

CapCity said...

I'm just SOOO glad to hear ANOTHER woman who thinks like this, Sistah JMW!! I have been in so many conversations where I have to shut UP because I am sick of women who cry the "victim"/weaker sex role. I strongly believe that there are a number of silent men/husbands being raped regularly, too! It IS possible...even if a males' ego won't admit it. Just because your "li'l man" is able doesn't always mean you're willing...
rape is rape - regardless of the gender...

Jazzy said...

Wow girl. I was in the middle of taking a sip of my tea as I clicked on your page and now it's luke warm because I had to set it aside.

"I personally think rape is an act of PHYSICAL FORCE... not MENTAL. If a woman ALLOWS a man to convince her to have sex with him when she REALLY didn't want to...she was NOT raped."

I have never been a victim of this. I would say I'm pretty strong-willed, especially when it comes to sex. However, I still disagree with you here.

At times women will have sex because they can't take the mental abuse (the verbal abuse and disrespect) from their mates after saying NO. By giving in, they pacify the mate (allowing themselves to be manipulated) but it still can leave a person feeling violated.

Rape is not always about physical force. I think it's more about a power struggle with the strong overpowering the weak.

A weak minded person is easy prey. It's easier to manipulate and coerce them into doing something they don't want to do, simply by attacking their character.

Whew girl...heavy topic, very thought provoking!

Sheletha said...

@dj
3) For not being compassionate and realizing how SENSITIVE and DELICATE women are

Again, equal but not the same, in GENERAL (not always) women are more sensitive and delicate i.e "The weaker vessel" as Scripture says, men should be aware of that and act accordingly.


THATS RIGHT BECAUSE I AM NOT TAKING OUT THE GARBAGE!!!!!

Jazzy said...

I don't have a problem taking out the garbage @ Sheletha.

Hell, I think I was a lot handier with the power tools then most of my ex's too! Hey that's just me!

BUT...I do agree with you, "in GENERAL women are more sensitive and delicate"...easier to manipulate.

Consistently Inconsistent... said...

I am always enlightened when I come to your page. I completely agree with the accountability portion and find this post to be very necessary. Thank you for sharing these thoughts and causing a bit of a ruckus too.

Miss Snarky Pants said...

Thankfully, I’ve never been a victim of any form of rape nor do I know anyone who has.

This topic however is one I don’t take lightly--AT ALL.

I can’t agree with you more in that it’s a woman’s responsibility NOT to put herself out there like that and especially so if it well sex is something she’s not ready for.

I believe you said it best in saying: “Never knowingly put yourself in a situation you can’t get out of; if you KNOW you don’t plan to have sex with a guy, there’s really no need playing after midnight (in house) games; if the dates over GO HOME (alone). What’s the point in starting things you KNOW you’re not going to finish…then expect the man to be the ‘bigger’ person and stop?”

I SECOND THIS EMOTION.

This is NOT to say though that if a woman feels she was violated -- she should chalk things up as it being “her fault”—-or something she brought on herself.

That’s one of the main reasons so many rape cases go unreported.

Mizrepresent said...

This is a very powerful subject, and though i have some thoughts, i can't really add anything to what's been said. Both points made here are valid, but i ultimately think each case is individual.

JustMeWriting said...

SO YOU GUYS DON'T HATE ME??? LOL!

Anonymous said...

Under no circumstance is a woman accountable for being raped. If things are getting hot & heavy and the woman says no, for them to engage in sex would then require the man to hold her down and physically force her to do it.

"Never knowingly put yourself in a situation you can’t get out of; if you KNOW you don’t play to have sex with a guy, there’s really no need playing after midnight (in house) games; if the dates over GO HOME (alone). What’s the point in starting things you KNOW you’re not going to finish…then expect the man to be the ‘bigger’ person and stop?"

I agree with this entire statement except the last part. How does not forcing your penis inside a woman who said NO make one a 'bigger' person? No, that would make him a normal non-rapist person.

Who are these men that have all this confusion and fear of being accused of rape? I certainly don't know any.

I just don't like the blame the victim mentality of this post. It's taking rape way too lightly, imo. Equality in the eyes of the law doesn't change the fact that men ARE physically stronger than women.

Jazzy said...

Of course not...I do however find it interesting that so many women think fault should lie with the 'victim' and not necessarily with the forceful person, but c'est la vie.

Miss Snarky Pants said...

What it do JMW??
You need a honeycomb hideout homegirl?? **cuz I gotchu**

LOL.

Girl ain't nobody hatin' on you!! Just voicing our own obviously very strong opinions...dats all!

I was waiting for you to make a comeback in the comments and was like dayum...Where a sista at?? Why come she ain't sayin' nuffin!!??

Jameil said...

on some of this i can agree w/you but i've had too many friends who were raped or nearly raped. one friend has been repeatedly date raped. as in she said no and he just kept pressing and pressing and she kept saying no. and its happened multiple times. and she didn't really think there was anything wrong with it b/c they'd had sex before. this is partially perpetuated by the idea that the woman is somehow at fault. no you shouldn't put temptation there but men need to stand up and be MEN and take responsibility for their actions.

this is a sore subject for me.
http://jameil.blogspot.com/2006/03/state-of-black-america-pt-iv-rapists.html

JustMeWriting said...

cap: LOL... I've stopped being surprised by your agreement with some of my views; you've said yourself we're like kindred spirits and I've NEVER agreed more. THANKS LADY.

op.d: HAHAHAH, I'm sorry I messed ya tea up boo-boo.
"At times women will have sex because they can't take the mental abuse (the verbal abuse and disrespect) from their mates after saying NO. By giving in, they pacify the mate (allowing themselves to be manipulated) but it still can leave a person feeling violated."

Now, diva, that WHOLE thing equals an abusive relationship that shouldn't exist and thereby making the woman still responsible for her own situation...because if that's the case (and I'm sure it didn't just start) she's allowed herself to be there, so she's violated herself (to me)...she can't expect more from other then she's willing to give herself.

"A weak minded person is easy prey. It's easier to manipulate and coerce them into doing something they don't want to do, simply by attacking their character." HECK YEAH... I TOTALLY AGREE, but I just don't think she's automatically a 'victim' or he's soley responsible for her weak mind...this is the think we've GOT to change. My statements may seem like I'm against women, but that so far from true (I'm a woman...case y'all dind't know...hahaha), but the same anger I feel when watching other black people act like fools, exist when I watch women act like anything other then the Mother's of the Earth that God made us to be.

sheletha: lol...you and me either.
c.i: you're welcom and I'm glad you're back from your LONGGGGG b-day celebration.

ms.b: "This is NOT to say though that if a woman feels she was violated -- she should chalk things up as it being “her fault”—-or something she brought on herself." AHHHH, now this is where things get tricky since there are sooooo many levels of violations; something that changes from person to person, but you're so right, by no means should she feel like it's ALL 'her fault,' but she should certainly consider her involement to avoid future similar situations.

miz: HECK YEAH... each situation is different for sure, but like Tasha pointed out, the overall societal outlook in most cases is that the woman is the victim.

JustMeWriting said...

k: "Under no circumstance is a woman accountable for being raped. If things are getting hot & heavy and the woman says no, for them to engage in sex would then require the man to hold her down and physically force her to do it."

THAT'S VERY TRUE, and AGAIN...I'M NOT SAYING THAT'S RIGHT. What I'm saying is SHE should ALSO realize her position...like you also said, "Equality in the eyes of the law doesn't change the fact that men ARE physically stronger than women." NOW, with that in mind...to KNOWINGLY get in a situation that could result in such a heinous crime (that is in NO way taken lightly by me) is STILL a judgement call on behalf of the WOMAN.

I'm going to try to explain that 'bigger' person statement...I was refering to the fact that there may have been a lack of control (within her natural desire) on the part of the woman to have engaged as far as she did, but expected the man to NOT show that same lack of control(within the same desire)and stop imediately upon request.

op.d: now I HOPE you don't really think I think that??? But, not EVERY woman who cries rape is a victim...and that's what I'm talking about...and with those cases there's a level of accountability that's rarely addressed.

ms.b: HAHAHA...(sniff, sniff...thank you mama). naw, I was actually on a LONGGG lunch, but you KNOW I appreciate all the commentary you guys have given and I KNEW this was going to be a sore subject, but I can ALMOST promise it's the last time I'll get you guys mad at me...LOL.

jameil: I'm so sorry to hear you friend having been in that situation.

JustMeWriting said...

k: "THAT'S VERY TRUE, and AGAIN...I'M NOT SAYING THAT'S RIGHT."

the end of that statement should read: "I'M NOT SAYING RAPE IS RIGHT."

CapCity said...

I agree in NO WAY, SHAPE or FORM am I saying that the "victim" is AT fault. ALL's I advocate is PUHLEEEEZE train your children to be VERY aware of themselves and their surroundings AT ALL times. AND when it don't feel right - do what EVER u can to get out of it - teach them not to freeze & panic. I can say I'm blessed & never been put in that situation - but again PLEASE teach your children the best U can to take the NECESSARY steps to SAVE themselves from harm. No matter how many laws are on the books no one wants to be the one with those terrifying memories that need to be relived in a court of law...
...in Jesus' name I pray!

This actually makes me think of Bro Ced's Musical Post of The Procussions that bought tears to my eyes.

Jazzy said...

That's why I put quotes around victim. I see her as a victim and most of you see her as a woman who should have known better...should have been stronger...should have been smarter...shouldn't have allowed someone to force her to do something she didn't want to do.

I think I'm going to agree to disagree on this one and keep it moving.

It's almost 5 o'clock (my fave time of the weekday - yaaay!)...hasta manana folks!

Rich Fitzgerald said...

I'll be back - this is good - but it's time to go home.

Michael Fisher said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michael Fisher said...

Dayum. How old are you? It must be your soul that's about 10,000 years old.

In any case. My general rule is, if a woman says no even if I'm in the middle of intercourse with her. I stop. Period.

As to the issue of women using sex as power. Well, to tell the truth, the only power that can overcome a woman is another woman. Or two, or three.

If a woman plays games like that she can be guaranteed that her man is gone be off into the arms of another. Men's egos are extremely fragile.

They get their affirmation from women.

Dangerfield said...

"It's the double standard that I can't stand."

mark bey: I have noticed that a lot of times women only mind the double standards if they dont benifit from them. Their are some double standards and culturals predjudices/bias I dont see women complaining about at all.

Alls depends on who the double standard effects negatively thats who it bothers. I would make the smiley face but you cant on blogger.

P.S I dont blame yalls if I was a female I use feminity to my advantage too. I cant blame yall one be you are supposed utilize your resorcers.

JustMeWriting said...

cap: I'M WITH YOU

op.d: I feel you

rich: ok dude

m.f: I've always loved having an ole sole...hahah.

mark: you're so right about that... there are TOO many double standards...across the board.

Anonymous said...

@ Just Me: "I'm going to try to explain that 'bigger' person statement...I was refering to the fact that there may have been a lack of control (within her natural desire) on the part of the woman to have engaged as far as she did, but expected the man to NOT show that same lack of control(within the same desire)and stop imediately upon request."

That statement doesn't make sense to me. Again, the fact that a man has to use physical force to NOT stop upon request comepletely kills your argument. He has to pin her arms to the side with one hand and force her legs open with the other to NOT stop. That's A LOT.

Women aren't the only ones who've ever said STOP right before things have gone too far. In that situation should the woman not stop upon his request and doing so would make her the 'bigger' person?

Justme, you seem to think that there are some sort of signs that a man displays that he may be a rapist. In some cases that may be true but most of the time it's not. If it were that simple there wouldn't be so many victims of rape and/or molestation.

If a man decides that he wants to rape you then that is what he's going to do. You can live your life just never going on dates (he could rape you in his car on the way to the movies), never inviting a man over for dinner (he could rape you in your house), never using public restrooms (a man could be waiting in the wings), never going to clubs or bars, never leaving the house without a gun in hand and fully loaded. Hell, just never leave the house at all. That's the only way to prevent rape and even then you can't be to sure so you'd better keep all your windows and doors locked even when it's 80 degrees outside.

But who wants to live like that?

@ Mark - "I have noticed that a lot of times women only mind the double standards if they dont benifit from them. Their are some double standards and culturals predjudices/bias I dont see women complaining about at all."

As if men are ANY different.

JustMeWriting said...

k: I'm going to leave this alone. this was something I've always talked about...(I get my point across better talking then typing).

Of course I'm not talking about all rapes, or all victims and you're right about there being no signs that a man might be a rapist, but there might not be a sign to someone having HIV, but we're still smart enough to try to protect ourselves against the potential...that's what I'm saying; Be cautious, be honest (with yourself and him), be responsible for your actions.

Coko Mulan said...

hmm.. i dunno.. i'm still young.. and a virgin... and I've been hot n heavy many times... But.. I ALWAYS ALWAYS let a boy know what's going down before he gets there... The conversation goes like this "Please do not come to my house/dorm/apartment (whichever it was at the time) and think that you are about to get some because... you aren't. So if that's what you coming for don't, I understand. I mean.. if you want to stop talking to me because of it, I understand that too." However, 90% of the time they still come and they try me.. they think they r going to change my mind.. and stuff happens.. and they say "well how about u just let me do this... or that" and i say no because you gonna want to fuck (excuse my french but thats what i say)... i mean... it's all in the will power... and yeah.. i have gotten really close and said no BUT it was always noted before hand that it wasn't going down.. no matter what.

JustMeWriting said...

mzcoko: YES... now, that's what I'm talking about girl. You put that out there strong (french excused...lol)...and I'm sure if one of those times when you gotten really close and said no, if this happened to have been a guy (the wrong guy) and he took upon himself to force himself on you...AFTER you called the cops and dealt with all that came with that...at some point you'd have said somewhere within yourself..."I will really think twice about letting things get close again, because some people are just crazy, evil, unstable etc." that piece of acknowledgemen is what I'm talking about here. Thank you lady for your comment...I pray the Lord places a shield of protection about you because we're living in perilous times. I commend you for maintaining your virginity for this long...might as well go all the way to marriage. God bless you lady.

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Ok, here is my two cents. I agree that women should be held accountable in certain situations. As long as the act is not by the hands of some guy she doesn't know who's just out for prey. That guy should be castrated then prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

Now, date rape is sticky at best because there are situations where the chick doesn't see it coming because she's never been with the guy. Now the lady who's been with a guy on more than one occasion and then lets him get in the act again and then says stop is tripping. Those are games that shouldn't be played. She should have thought about whether she was in the mood before getting naked. I've only been in that situation once (over 12 years ago) and I stopped, because there was no doubt she wanted to stop, she was feeling guilty because of the sin we were commiting at the time. But would I have been wrong to keep going - maybe, but I also wouldn't have called it rape if I tried to persuade her to continue - not by forcing her down, but maybe changing up the technique or something - I mean, we were butt booty naked right. It wasn't like I did the "let me just put the tip in" trick. Nevertheless, I was always taught to accept NO, so that's how I always rolled.

The only other time I think women should be held accountable is in those instances where they are lying to either protect there azz or to get back at the dude for something he did - probably with another chick. The truth shouldn't always be based on the woman's recollection of the events. Many a dude have been falsely accused just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time and that's just foul. Sex crimes causes the accused to bear the burden of guilt no matter what went down and for that women should be prosecuted if they have been found to have lied.

That's my two cents. I'm out.

Dangerfield said...

"@ Mark - "I have noticed that a lot of times women only mind the double standards if they dont benifit from them. Their are some double standards and culturals predjudices/bias I dont see women complaining about at all."

As if men are ANY different. "


mark bey: That is very, very true. Sorry I forgot to include that. LOL

Andrew The Asshole said...

great post... both topics are important for women to tackle. men too

JustMeWriting said...

rich: man you hit the nail on the head...and that's what I'm talking about. YES, no means no...and YES the guy who ignores that is WRONG, but there is liability on behalf of the women.

MY FINAL THOUGHS:
Women started fighting for equality over one hundred years ago, but in certain situations society still views her as a “helpless victim,” a notion that’s conveniently perpetuated by too many women. The tolerance of this societal norm has allowed many women to escape even the thought of accepting responsibility for one’s own behavior; thereby making themselves eternal victims…”if you want to be free, then you need some accountability.” (Lisa McClendon)

I THANK EVERYONE FOR THEIR COMMENTS ON THIS VERY SERIOUS MATTER. I TRUELY HOPE NO ONE WAS OFFENDED AND THAT NO ILL FEELINGS ARE ALLOWED TO RESONATE...THESE DEBATES ARE GOOD FOR THE SOUL AND THE MIND. THANKS GUYS AND GOD BLESS.

Ab said...

oy lady, good post.. not commenting because well, the scenario is different down here. so it doesn make sense talking about something that aint gonna affect me!
ne wys

Coko Mulan said...

Thanx for praying for me... cuz it was easy when i just didn't talk to no guys in high school... but now.. that i'm dating.. and chilling with guys... and being around them... i dont know.. but i've lasted 2 years so we'll see...

And as far as after a rape... if you are getting hot and heavy with somebody that's crazy.. and you didn't know... that is your fault for not knowing that man well enough... cuz i bet $5 the girl wouldn't give him $100 but she would give him her most precious possession... her body.. puh-leaze i wish i would

Anonymous said...

I agree with some of the stuff said here, but i think the black community needs to start believing black women can be raped.

Many black people aren't there yet. I hear way more about those evil wenches that say they've been raped and how their lying sluts trying to take down a black man, than people acknowledging that black girls and women even get raped. I find it hard to believe that a black jury or even majority black jury would convict a black man of rape. I say black because despite all the brouhaha over black/white rape, most people are raped and abused by people of their own race.